Need to Process

I need to process, so this will go a few different directions I think. I really, really need to get the rest of summer pictures on here, what there was of it, anyway. It doesn't feel like we did a whole lot. I'm hoping there will be another month, at least, of nice weather.

I started back to work today. Didn't get much done. I really wanted to change up my seating into a more collaborative arrangement. I do a lot of small group work, so I wanted a better configuration for that.  I spent an hour or more moving my tables about, trying to find a way to get them into groups without having anyone sitting with their backs to the front. To do that, they had to be sideways. Kids would have to sit a bit sideways when looking up front, but doable. They weren't nice and neat and symmetrical, and that was making me itchy, but I was prepared to give it a try. But I couldn't make it work with traffic patterns. With bodies in chairs I wouldn't be able to move about the room hardly at all. I wasn't even sure if I could get back to my desk once you figure in backpacks and tall kids who are leg stretchers and whatall. So then I just put it all back to how it was when I walked in this morning. Waste. Of. Time. And now my back hurts and I probably have bruises all over my legs from pushing on tables. Oh well.

Lots of work anxiety. Lots. Hope it all goes OK. I'm teaching AP Language this year, which is new to me. The teacher who I'm taking over for has a really high pass rate, and I feel pressure to be as good as she is right off the bat.

I'm so sick of the way my classroom looks. I need to overhaul it, but who has time for that? I need to pull down all the posters and put up new artwork and blah blah and I don't have time. Boooo.

A while back, before the presidential primaries, I said that I didn't think Donald Trump really wanted to be President. I figured that he would drop out before he got this far because he was just in it for the ego and the notoriety, the press, and to be able to say that he could have beat everyone. So when he became the nominee, I went "huh". Weird. He seems like a guy who wouldn't want to be hampered by Secret Service, limited in where he can go and what he can do and what he can say, although, granted, he doesn't seem to worry much about that last one. He can't make any money while president, and as far as I understand he isn't allowed to own any businesses. But then, as the level of crazy has started to ramp up even higher, including such claims as Obama created ISIS with Hillary Clinton and alleging that President Obama paid the Attorney General of New York $15,000 "or some big sum of money" to investigate Trump University, I realized that I was right all along. Trump is just trying to figure out what it will take for people to stop supporting him. How crazy can he be, what outlandish claims can he make that will get people to finally realize that he cannot get anywhere near the presidency. He claimed he could commit murder out in the open in broad daylight and his supporters would still support him. I believe that is the truth. I think he doesn't want to be President, and that's why he doesn't calm down and start acting presidential. I also think he knows he's going to lose, and that's why he's started claiming the election is rigged. To save face. The problem is, he's creating a dangerous situation in which some American's will believe those lies and believe that Hillary somehow stole the presidency from Trump, and his base tends to be angry and scared. He's already called upon the "Second Ammendment" folks to stop Hillary Clinton. Scary.

Been watching the Olympics. That's always fun. Hoping to go to the lake on Sunday. My brain feels less cluttered now, so I think I'm done processing.

Life Goals

I love this. It's what I'm working toward. I think that she's right about self-reliance. It is really good for the self-esteem. Something to work on.

http://diydiva.net/2015/12/wherein-i-didnt-lose-inches-and-also-gained-perspective/

Catch Up

I really hate when I don't blog. I was going back into the archives looking for something the other day, and I was looking at all these pictures and reading all of these stories that I just don't remember. I hate that my memory is so terrible that I can't remember anything that happens (except for all of the awkward and embarassing and terrible things I do that I don't want to remember), so the only way for me to hold on to the good stuff is to write it down. Which I suck at doing. I also hate how everything is digital nowdays, which means that people like me have huge files full of pictures that will never see the light of day unless I do something like blog them. I won't scrapbook them or print them and put them in albums. They're just all jumbled in a mishmash on a hard drive. Ah, well. Best get to it, try to catch up some. I'm not going all the way back to the last time I left off. Too overwhelming. 

Spring Break 2016: Sand Hollow Trip

We went hiking in Snow Canyon again.  Josh climbed all the way to the top. I climbed up about half this high and it was too high for me. 

One of the few pics of us all where Josh is smiling. Sort of. 

The rest are variations of this face, and others.

We went the back way into Zion National Park, and it was snowing! Really weird. But beautiful.

We went hiking at Valley of Fire in Nevada. We hadn't ever been there before.We really liked it! There were some really cool hikes, and you could just climb all over the rocks.

These little "cabins" were built by the Park Service way back when the park opened in the 40s (I think?) for families to camp in.

View From Under My Awning at Sand Hollow:

Memorial Day Weekend: Bear Lake
It was fairly chilly there, of course, so we didn't do much playing in the water. We went up one of the canyons in Idaho to hike, and I fell in love with a piece of property for sale. I know just where I would put my house.

View From Under My Awning at Bear Lake

Lexi's 9th Birthday:
Lexi's birthday was the day we got home from Bear Lake, so it was pretty relaxed. She had some cheesecake, opened presents, and had her birthday dinner.

June 2016: Pineview
We went up camping the weekend school got out. In fact, when we got up there I had to put on a dress and drive down to Ogden to attend graduation for my school. Then I came back up and we had a nice weekend. Our site was really shady and cool, and it was very relaxing. There was almost no beach this year, so our chairs were half in the water.

View From Under My Awning at Pineview

This summer has been weird. Courtney broke her ankle Memorial Day weekend and had to have surgery. We've hung out over there quite a bit while she's gotten adjusted to doing things without being able to walk. The kids have been doing quite a bit of golfing. Lexi is in her second week of lessons, and Josh golfs once a week with the Junior Golf Club. Debate Nationals was the second week of summer vacation, so I was tied up with judging for that. It feels like we just haven't really done a whole lot this summer. I have a lot of work worries and stress hanging over me, and that's bringing me down, I think. I don't know. My house is hot. We bought new bedroom furniture. And a paddle board. Hopefully we can go out and paddle about a lot this summer. I have terrible balance. 

Song of the Day

Love this! Love Justin Timberlake. Love that it's full of regular people who dance like me. It's just happy and fun. Good Thursday night music.