No More Big Blue

Well, Sean sold his truck. It's strange... I hated that thing. I always threatened to leave it somewhere with the keys in it, hoping someone would steal it. I threatened to push it over a cliff. I threatened to give it away to anyone who would come drive it off. I told him it would take forever to sell that piece of crap. He put it up for sale and it was gone the next day. What do I know about trucks? Nothing. We had a couple guys calling from out of state wanting to buy it, for heaven's sake. The buyers came down from Logan. Crazy! I'm not so sure how I feel about this. We had it for so long, and the memory of it is so tied up in Sean. Sean without his old, beat up truck just doesn't feel right. From now on, anything he tears apart and rebuilds has to be some sort of classic sports car. Or a motorcycle. That would be cool.

Dropping Out of High School

Well, Josh had that one bad day, and now he loves kindergarten. He goes willingly and happily off to school. So that's a big relief. Now it's me who wants to drop out. Ugh. I have never had this hard a time going back to work. I mean, it's always a disappointment that summer is over, but usually I'm a little excited to get back into the routine. I start thinking about things I want to do with my students and making mental lists, I get excited to see if my older girls will like their classes, I gear up and get happy about it. This year I just can't muster up the energy. I went in today for a few hours to get my disclosures done and start to straighten up. Walking into the school was so familiar. Usually that's a good, comforting thing. Today it was an I've Spent Way Too Much Of My Life Here FREAKOUT kind of thing. The custodians moved everything out to clean the carpets over the summer, so all my stuff is stacked all over and I've got filing cabinets in the wrong place, and I just looked at it all and started to cry. Seriously, I've never done that before! I mean, not big sobbing tears, but just little poor-me tears. I love my job and I'm sure I'll get myself all sorted out really soon, but right now I'm having a hard time of it.

We've done some fun things the last week or so, trying to get it all in while we can, but it still feels like I need a few more weeks. We went camping up at Rockport, and it was this freakishly cold day, so we all froze. It was crazy. Lexi wouldn't sleep that night. She got overly tired, so she did that thing where they cry uncontrollably over nothing, and then she was happy, but she was singing Macho, Macho Man over and over again while we all cursed silently in our beds and vowed never to go camping again. I think we may still give it another go in September, but we haven't sufficiently recovered from the last one, so we'll see. We also went boating with one of Sean's friends, went to a Bee's game, went to the county fair, and went to the drive-in with Cami, Steve, Mindi, and Marilyn. Brittney and I have been staying up late every night watching movies. It's been a good summer. I'm going to try to hold on to it a little longer.